Guest Post: Love Twisted. Love Defined.
I am honored to have my dear friend, Sara Robillard, as my guest blogger for today. Sara and I have known each other several years, and she is truly the sister I never had. She is my “Sissy.” Sara is one of the best lyricists I know. She writes recovery testimonies and recovery-related blogs. She’s also a ghost writer for a non-profit organization. Sara’s story is one of hope and healing. I’m honored to have my Sissy share her heart with you today and hope you will be blessed by her story, “Love Twisted. Love Defined.”
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“Love Twisted. Love Defined.”
by Sara Robillard
Find Sara on Twitter
Love.
Love twisted. Love Defined.
That’s been my life thus far in a nutshell.
As a victim of physical, sexual, spiritual and psychological abuses for the first 20+ years of my life, it’s safe to say I felt pretty screwed up coming out of it. I had seen despair, I had felt hopelessness, but never as profoundly as I did entering recovery. I began to understand that I was being held accountable, and I needed to trust God if I had any chance of surviving. I fought it at first. I had my own way of dealing with things, but God began to break through all my mechanisms, drawing me to Himself. At the end of a long, weary battle, I found myself on my knees, my heart absolutely crushed, and throwing myself at Christ. He finally became my source of life, of hope, of love. No more idols. No more ideals. No more disappointment.
I struggled with how to handle this love relationship I had with God. I had been told I was “loved” before, but that was the twisted sort. Taking and demanding. Using and abusing. Based on merit and emotion. I turned to His word, looking for the truth. And I found it. I found it in the example of Christ, in His action upon the cross out of love for me (1 John 4:9). I found it demonstrated through His people as they ministered to me (1 John 4:11-12). I found it as I began to understand how to express my love to Him through simple obedience (1 John 5:2-3).
He chose me. He set me apart to be His own before the world began. I know that I have never been alone. And I am constantly being romanced by Him in all that is around me. Somehow, I have found myself desperately in love, going from one extreme to another. I have no idea how it happened…it was so subtle, so profound, so beautiful.
And to think, this is what He desires for us all.
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Come alongside…Has love been twisted for you? Can you allow God to define it? Comment below.