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Relationships

Favorite…Least Favorite

Several years ago, my boyfriend–now my husband–and I started a tradition that has continued with our three children: “Favorite…Least Favorite.”

 

It goes like this: At any given moment, someone will ask…

 

“What’s your favorite part of today so far?”

 

Each person answers the question with a specific action, event, etc. No generic, “I liked everything” answers. Also, no one is allowed to poke fun of any answer, but anyone can ask follow-up questions.

 

After each person has answered the favorite question, then the next question is asked.

 

“What’s your least favorite part of today so far?”

 

Again, each person answers the question, and especially during this second part of the game, no poking fun is allowed–or refuting someone’s response, etc.

 

We started this game when my boyfriend went away for work, and we would call each other at the end of the day to say our goodnights. By asking each other these questions, we were able to take part in the joys of each other’s day and also the sad–or disappointing–parts of the day. It also helped us to meditate on the day and to be sure we access a range of feelings–not leaving any to pile up inside.

 

Now that we have children, we’re using “Favorite…Least Favorite” to help them process and express feelings. We’re also learning a lot about each other. Truth be told, we’re not the ones who are bringing up “Favorite…Least Favorite” these days. They are!

 

When others are happy, be happy with them. If they are sad, share their sorrow. (Romans 12:15)

 

I encourage you to try it out for yourselves. To get us started….

 

“What was your favorite part of the weekend?”

 

For me, it was spending Sunday with family I hadn’t seen in decades–some I hadn’t even met, and introducing them all to my husband and my three children.

 

“What was your least favorite part of the weekend?”

 

Trying to encourage my introverted daughter to interact with other children at her cousin’s birthday party on Saturday–instead of sitting on a bench with her head down.

 

Come alongside…What about you? What was your favorite part of the weekend? How about your least favorite?

 

Two Articles Published: “Serenity, Please” and “If I Text Him, He Will Answer…Won’t He?”

 
I am honored to have two articles published.

 

 

“Serenity, Please” at Mentoring Moments for Christian Women

 

 

“If I Text Him, He Will Answer…Won’t He?” at Inspired Women Magazine

 

 

I hope you will read, comment, and share.

 

Big hugs,

Daphne

Cleaning out my closet

I dreaded doing it, but I knew I needed to. Clothes were starting to pile up everywhere, and I couldn’t find what I needed when I wanted to wear it. Can you relate?

 

So I opened the closet door and started pulling things out one by one.

  • Pants.
  • Shirts.
  • Jeans.
  • Shorts.
  • Dresses.

 

 

Thoughts of the past flooded my mind as I reached in for each item.

 

Ooh, I remember when I wore that one.

 

or

 

Oh, that one looked really good on me.

 

 

and

 

Ugh, I wish I could get into that one again.

 

 

Never mind that I hadn’t worn any of these things in–well, I can’t remember the last time I wore them. They were out of style. And they had that musty closet smell too.

 

So why did I hold on to them for so long? Why did I leave them in the closet without even giving them a second thought? Why did I let them pile up?

 

It’s hard letting go of the past, isn’t it? No matter how great today is, I tend to say–or think, “I wish I could do XYZ–or be XYZ–again.”

 

Truth is: Sometimes we hold on to things that are meant to stay in the past. They were in our lives only for a season–a beginning, middle, and end.

 

There is a time for everything, and everything on earth has its special season. There is a time to be born and a time to die. There is a time to plant and a time to pull up plants. There is a time to kill and a time to heal. There is a time to destroy and a time to build. There is a time to cry and a time to laugh. There is a time to be sad and a time to dance. There is a time to throw away stones and a time to gather them. There is a time to hug and a time not to hug. There is a time to look for something and a time to stop looking for it. There is a time to keep things and a time to throw things away. (Ecclesiastes 3:1-6)

 

Time is up for these old clothes. Time can also be up for a lot of other things in our lives:

 

  • Relationships.
  • Careers.
  • Ministries.
  • Hurts.

 

I’m cleaning out my closet. Are you?

 

God can help you throw away your old clothes

 
Come alongside… What have you been holding on to? Why? What steps can you take to let it go?

 

 

Gimme a Break

 

Lately, this commercial has been running through my mind. Do you remember it?

 

 

I could just say that I’ve been eating too much too late at night–maybe too much chocolate. But I know all too well that God uses the simple things to remind me of His love for me.

 

You see, lately I’ve been too hard on myself. I’m entering a new season in my life–motherhood, and I’m feeling a little ill-prepared.

 

  • Inexperienced.
  • Inadequate.
  • Unqualified.

 

I haven’t struggled with my perfectionism in awhile, and these feelings have actually taken me by surprise. Old issue–new circumstances.

 

The first week was really a struggle for me. I beat myself up for forgetting hand wipes, for not bringing snacks and water on long car rides, you name it. All seemingly minor details blown up in the “shoulds” of my mind. I should be able to … I should know how to …

 

Then I remembered the Kit Kat commercial, especially the part that goes, “Break me off a piece of that Kit-Kat bar!” (You know the tune.)

 

I had to step back and take an objective look at my situation: I am a new mom. I have gone from zero children to five adoptive children–three of which are already in my home. This is uncharted territory for me–definitely a step of faith. If anything, I shouldn’t know how to do these things–I have never traveled this road before.

 

This is an opportune time for my perfectionism and unrealistic expectations to rent space in my head.

 

But I’m not letting them. I’m giving myself a break.

 

God will never let me be pushed past my limit, and He will always be here to help me come through the ups and downs of whatever situation I face (1 Corinthians 10:13). I refuse to discount the small steps I am taking. Instead, I rejoice with God every time I take a step in the right direction (Zechariah 4:10). Even more, I treasure the little rewards along the way:

 

  • Hugs and kisses from my children.
  • The way they call me “mommy princess.”
  • Their prayers thanking God for this family.

 

It won’t be easy, but I can do it (Philippians 4:13)! God is cheering me on. He is on my side (Romans 8:31).

 

Gimme a break, gimme a break, break me off a piece of God’s grace and love. 

 

Come alongside… How about you? In what areas of your life do you have unrealistic expectations? How can you give yourself a break? 

 

 

New Article: “In the Fullness of Time…”

Awhile back, I mentioned that Mentoring Moments for Christian Women invited me to become one of their staff writers.

 

 

“In the Fullness of Time” is my most recent publication at MMCW.

 

I hope you will read, comment, and share.

 

And if you haven’t already subscribed to Mentoring Moments, I encourage you to do so.

 

Big hugs,
Daphne

Affiliate Disclosure

Daphne Tarango is a participant in affiliate programs with Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, DaySpring, Church Source, Hazelden, Christian Strong (via Conversant and ShareASale). These advertising services are designed to provide a means for sites like DaphneWrites.com to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to said merchants. Some images and articles may contain links to products on merchant sites. Should you choose to make purchases through those links, please understand that I will receive a small commission. Please do not feel like you need to use these links to make any purchases. The links are only for your convenience. Thank you.

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