I Just Want to Hear Your Voice
Last night, I tossed and turned. Stared at the clock. Tried to get comfortable. Fluffed my pillow. Snuggled up in a fetal position. Still couldn’t seem to get there.
1:05
1:30
2:15
2:45
3:10
Sigh.
I guess that’s what I get for drinking coffee, which is not a “regular” thing for me. I’m usually a decaf person. 😉
In the past, I’ve breathed deeply, tried to clear my head, counted sheep. Even cried.
Although I’m not always consistent with it, one thing I’ve started to do whenever I can’t sleep is to pray. Have you tried praying when you can’t sleep?
- For your husband.
- Family.
- Children.
- Friends.
- Work.
- Finances.
- Missionary friends.
- Pastors and church leaders.
- Situations and circumstances—you know, the stuff of life.
- Oh, and for yourself.
You can also thank and praise God when you can’t sleep.
- For His faithfulness.
- Forgiveness.
- His love.
- Jesus Christ.
- Food, shelter.
- Protection.
- Not giving me what I deserve.
- Giving me blessings I didn’t—and couldn’t—earn.
God doesn’t sleep, dear one. He still works when we are fast asleep—or wide awake.
The one who watches over you … never tires and never sleeps (Psalm 121:3-4).
Isn’t that reassuring? God watches over you! Even during the nighttime hours, He’s working things out for your good, for the good of your family, for someone you might not have thought of in years. Sometimes, He wants to hear from you in the middle of the night: What’s on your mind, what’s worrying you, what’s exciting you lately. So he gently nudges you awake. “I want to hear your voice. Can we talk?” Or if you’re already tossing and turning, “Hi, wanna talk?” He longs for it!
O my beloved, lingering in the gardens, how wonderful that your companions can listen to your voice. Let me hear it, too! (Song of Solomon 8:13)
Let me hear your voice. Your voice is so sweet. Your face is so lovely. (Song of Solomon 2:14)
Wow! God longs to hear from you. He desires your heart–and your voice–during your busy day and restless night. To Him, “Every syllable you speak [is] a delicacy to savor” (Song of Solomon 4:11). Oh, how He loves you!
I could’ve had too much coffee. Or maybe God wanted to talk. Or both. Regardless, He wanted to hear my voice. And I, His.
Afterward, sweet dreams.
Come alongside: How do you handle insomnia? Do you pray when you can’t sleep? Do you have a testimony of unknowingly praying for someone during the night, later learning that, at that very moment, they needed prayer? Or maybe you were on the receiving end. Please share with us in the comments. Remember, you can comment anonymously if you so choose.
Related Products
|
|
Do You Know Someone with a Mental Illness? Yes, you do.
Do you know someone with a mental illness?
- Depression
- Bipolar depression disorder
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
- Schizophrenia
- Seasonal affective disorder
- Panic disorder
- Another mental illness
Maybe you yourself have a mental illness.
Here are some statistics from the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) that might surprise you. Did you know that…
One in four adults—approximately 57.7 million Americans—experience a mental health disorder in a given year.
One in 17 lives with a serious mental illness such as schizophrenia, major depression or bipolar disorder.
One in 10 children live with a serious mental or emotional disorder.
Bipolar disorder affects 5.7 million American adults, approximately 2.6 percent of the adult population per year.
Of adults using homeless services, 31 percent reported having combination of these conditions.
Despite effective treatments, there are long delays—sometimes decades—between the first onset of symptoms and when people seek and receive treatment.
Fewer than one-third of adults and one-half of children with a diagnosable mental disorder receive mental health services in a given year.
Racial and ethnic minorities are less likely to have access to mental health services and often receive a poorer quality of care.
And this doesn’t account for the millions of people who go undiagnosed—or are willing to admit—and accept—they have a mental illness.
I say all this because…
I have bipolar depression disorder.
People near and dear to me have bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, panic disorder, depression, and countless other mental illnesses. We are not statistics. Neither are the millions of people who struggle with these disorders.
Many people in the Bible experienced mental illness:
- Job (Job 3:11; 7:15)
- Moses (Numbers 11:15)
- King David (Psalms)
- Jonah (Jonah 4:3)
These Biblical heroes—they were pillars of the faith—cried out to God in their distress. And God answered them. He still answers today with:
- His Word—the Bible
- Prayer
- Comfort
- Support groups
- Counselors and therapists
- Psychiatrists
- Medicine
Before being officially diagnosed as bipolar in 2009, I lived a chaotic life—most people never would have known. But my mental life was in disarray. I managed—and even was quite successful, using my manic states to my advantage by being super-productive to the point of becoming a workaholic. Some would call that being successful; I would call it being in bondage to my own pride:
I didn’t want to get help.
I feared others would see me as weak, crazy, or even that I had committed some awful sin. I only sought help when I couldn’t manage any longer after experiencing a traumatic situation in early 2009.
I got help. And you can too. Your family and friends can get help.
Today, I live a very peaceful and joyful life—all due to God, family and friends, support groups, counselors, psychiatrists, and yes—even medicine.
In the words of Michael Fitzpatrick of NAMI: “Simply put, treatment works, if you can get it. But in America today, it is clear that many people living with mental illness are not provided with the essential treatment they need.”
Dear one, please get the treatment you need. Use all available resources—start with God and if necessary, say yes to medication.
You can do more than manage. You can have your life—the life God wants for you not only in eternity but also in the here and now.
It’s your time!
I have come that they may have life and have it in abundance. (John 10:10)
Come alongside: Which of these statistics surprised you most? Do you struggle with mental illness? Are you seeking treatment for it? Why or why not? What can you do to take that first step toward a full life? How can you help your loved one seek the help he or she needs? Please leave your comments below—and remember, you can comment anonymously if you so desire.
For more information on mental illnesses, please visit NAMI, the American Psychiatric Association, the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, and the National Institute of Mental Health.
Related Products
|
Playing Tug-of-War with Angels
“Right now, we’re just playing tug-of-war with angels.”
The doctor’s voice ushered in reality for us. Our NeeNee–the matriarch in the family–was dying. Doctors resuscitated her numerous times that morning–the day before Thanksgiving.
It was now our decision: To sign or not to sign the DNR form.
My husband, his step-mom Tracy, and I. No one else in the family had made it to the hospital yet.
The three of us looked at each other, tears streaming down our faces.
“We hate to do this to you,” said the doctor, “but we need to know now.”
We knew NeeNee wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. She was ready to go home.
“Do not resuscitate.”
I walked behind the doctor to the room where NeeNee lay, Tracy beside me. My husband left to pick up family members.
Our NeeNee lay motionless in the bed. I held her left hand while Tracy held her right hand. We cried alongside her, prayed over her, but most of all, we loved on her. She was non-responsive, even before the doctors disconnected the machinery. But we knew she could hear us.
Periodically, we watched her vitals, slowing with each passing moment.
Still, she held on.
A chaplain came and prayed with us.
We waited for the others to arrive. Minutes seemed like hours, but Tracy and I treasured every moment with our NeeNee. She took deep breaths every once in awhile, as we reassured her, “It’s okay. Go on home.”
I caressed her hair and rubbed my index finger on her cheek. Every once in awhile, I leaned in to kiss her and tell her I loved her. Her vitals would spike and then slowly decline again.
“It’s okay, NeeNee. Go on home.”
I held her hand and remembered the day I met her–a beautiful smile that welcomed me into her family. She knew no strangers and loved all who came around her. She was the family historian–a storyteller who could take a 5-minute tale and turn it into a 30-minute epic. She remembered everyone’s birthday and anniversary and freely gave out of the little she herself possessed. Her heart was toward her family.
Now her heart was failing her. She was tired and ready–ready to leave this world of physical pain and enter into paradise with her Savior. Her sister, mother, and father would be waiting for her there too.
And yet, the angels tugged at her. We tugged as well.
Pulse.
15-0.
15-0.
15-0.
Outside the room, I heard a noise. Turned around to see some of our family members. “They’re here,” I said.
15.
0.
0.
0.
0.
I bowed my head and cried. She waited. They arrived. She let go of the rope. Quietly, peacefully, she entered eternity. No more pain, no more exhaustion. God, in His mercy, extended her the ultimate gift–not only the freedom from pain and exhaustion, but also the gift of Himself.
But why grant me such a gift? Why would God grant me the gift of ushering a beautiful soul into His presence? To witness the passing of a Godly woman–a daughter, a sister, a wife, an aunt and friend to many? Why would He have me share this life-changing occasion with Tracy? Why?
Love.
The love that took NeeNee home is the same love that shone down on me that day. It’s the same generous love God shines down on me every moment, every day (Psalm 84:11). God’s perfect love transcends suffering and pain–NeeNee’s and mine.
In death and in life, we play tug-of-war with angels. In death and in life, I want to let go of the rope.
We love you, NeeNee, and we’ll see you soon.
Come alongside… In what ways are you playing tug-of-war with God? How can you let go of the rope?