Tell Me About Your Day
Hi, friends!
When my husband and I were dating, we started a tradition of telling each other our favorite and least favorite things of the day. We learned a lot about each other, and it helped us to stay connected, especially when he was working hundreds of miles away.
This proved better for us than just asking “How are you doing?” because, as most people, we would answer, “Fine.” By asking each other about our favorite and least favorite parts of the day, we deepened our relationship. Our answers revealed so much more than a simple one-word answer ever could:
- Interests
- Concerns
- Sense of humor
- Feelings
- Values
It could have been easy to forget about it when he returned from working halfway across the country. Instead, we kept it going. Now that we’ve adopted our children, we’ve involved them as well. They love it and look forward to talking about their day–whether it’s after church, after school, after a family outing, during dinner, at the end of the day.
As Valentine’s Day approaches, I wanted to share this idea with you in the form of my very first printable: “Tell Me About Your Day.” I hope you will print it and use it with your significant other, with your family, and even with your friends. I would suggest even laminating it. I know it will help to deepen relationships with those around you. It has helped me to be consistent in learning about the people I love.
Here is a full-color version:
Here is a grayscale version:
What better way to come alongside your loved ones and invite them into your life. 🙂
Let me know how it goes. I would love to hear how this tool helps you.
Hugs,
Daphne
P.S. — Happy Valentine’s Day. 😀
Come alongside. What was your favorite part of today? What about your least favorite part of the day? Share with us in the comments below.
Relapse Ain’t Got Nothin’ on My Recovery Group
Hi, friends!
Let’s talk recovery. More specifically, relapse.
We see it over and over again on the news, mainly with celebrities whose relapse into addictions and unhealthy behaviors results in death. Singer Whitney Houston comes to mind. Just this week, actor Philip Seymour Hoffman died after being clean more than two decades. He relapsed last year.
This isn’t just about celebrities. We see relapse more and more in the lives of those around us—family, friends, acquaintances, even people at church. We might be the ones in relapse.
I’ve relapsed.
This past year has been incredibly difficult for me: Emotional stress, financial issues, and tense relationships. Like others in recovery, I’ve had a hard time not falling back into old habits when I face triggers. I’ve had some missteps–even skidding back to square one in several areas. I’ll be honest: I wasn’t practicing what I wrote two years ago about preventing and reversing relapse:
- Reflect
- Expose your triggers and plan your escape strategies
- Look up and re-learn scripture passages
- Activate your accountability partners
- Pray, pray, pray
- Share your story
- Evaluate regularly
(You can find more detailed explanations about each of these tips in part one and part two from 2012.)
One thing has been important for me to step back onto–and stay on–my recovery path:
I started attending weekly recovery group meetings again.
Recovery groups aren’t just for people who struggle with drugs or alcohol. Recovery groups are for people who struggle with anger, codependency, food addictions, workaholism, pornography addictions, fear and worry, trust, and so much more. People like me and possibly you.
I made a lot of progress when I was attending group, so I didn’t see the need to keep going once I was “better.” Now I remember why it’s important to attend my recovery group regularly. I have people who hold me accountable. They don’t judge me, criticize me, or look at me any differently when I make a bad choice. They listen, understand, and love me no matter what. My recovery group keeps me from relapsing. They are my family.
Attending weekly also helps me to live consistently, my word for this year.
I don’t know why I ever stopped attending. 😉
Today, I encourage you: If you’re struggling to stay on your recovery path–or if you’re already on an unhealthy and destructive path, find a recovery group in your area. Celebrate Recovery is a great place to get connected. You’ll meet with others who will walk with you, encourage you, and love you.
Two people are better than one. They can help each other in everything they do. Suppose someone falls down. Then his friend can help him up. But suppose the man who falls down doesn’t have anyone to help him up. Then feel sorry for him! Or suppose two people lie down together. Then they’ll keep warm. But how can one person keep warm alone? One person could be overpowered. But two people can stand up for themselves. And a rope made out of three cords isn’t easily broken. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)
Don’t go it alone. Relapse ain’t got nothin’ on recovery groups!*
Come alongside… Are you staying on track in your recovery? Have you taken steps back? What can you do to get back on the right path? Share with us in the comments below. Remember, you can comment anonymously.
*Note: I don’t mean to minimize addiction by saying it’s easy to recover by solely attending recovery groups. Other resources and treatments might be necessary to address recovery. Recovery groups are just one component to address recovery, relapse, and addictive behaviors.
Related Products
10 Benefits of Friends
So I was thinking about my friends and how much I cherish each one of them. Though I love them and thank God for them, I haven’t spent much time with them lately. It’s so easy for me to stay indoors, not talk to anyone, and be a loner. To be and have a friend takes time, effort, and risks. But, oh, the benefits! Here are ten:
Encouragement
So cheer each other up with the hope you have. Build each other up. (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
Let us not give up meeting together. Some are in the habit of doing this. Instead, let us cheer each other up with words of hope. Let us do it all the more as you see the day coming when Christ will return. (Hebrews 10:25)
Help
So Joshua fought against the Amalekites, just as Moses had ordered. Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. As long as Moses held his hands up, the Israelites were winning. But every time he lowered his hands, the Amalekites began to win. When Moses’ arms got tired, Aaron and Hur got a stone and put it under him. Then he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up. Aaron was on one side, and Hur was on the other. Moses’ hands remained steady until sunset. So Joshua destroyed the Amalekite army with swords. (Exodus 17:10-13)
Suppose someone falls down. Then his friend can help him up. But suppose the man who falls down doesn’t have anyone to help him up. Then feel sorry for him! (Ecclesiastes 4:10)
Teammate
Two people are better than one. They can help each other in everything they do. (Ecclesiastes 4:9)
Compassion
Or suppose two people lie down together. Then they’ll keep warm. But how can one person keep warm alone? (Ecclesiastes 4:11)
Fight for and defend each other
One person could be overpowered. But two people can stand up for themselves. And a rope made out of three cords isn’t easily broken. (Ecclesiastes 4:12)
Unconditional Love
A friend loves at all times. He is there to help when trouble comes. (Proverbs 17:17)
Loyalty
Don’t desert your friend or your father’s friend. And don’t go to your family when trouble strikes you. A neighbor nearby is better than a family member far away. (Proverbs 27:10)
Saul told his son Jonathan and all of the attendants to kill David. But Jonathan liked David very much. So Jonathan warned him, “My father Saul is looking for a chance to kill you. Be very careful tomorrow morning. Find a place to hide and stay there. My father and I will come and stand in the field where you are hiding. I’ll speak to him about you. Then I’ll tell you what I find out.” (1 Samuel 19:1-3)
Sacrifice
Jonathan took off the robe he was wearing and gave it to David. He also gave him his military clothes. He even gave him his sword, his bow and his belt. (1 Samuel 18:4)
Prayer partners
Again, here is what I tell you. Suppose two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for. My Father in heaven will do it for you. Where two or three people meet together in my name, I am there with them. (Matthew 18:19-20)
They all came together regularly to pray. The women joined them too. So did Jesus’ mother Mary and his brothers. (Acts 1:14)
Sharing life together
The believers studied what the apostles taught. They shared life together. They broke bread and ate together. And they prayed. (Acts 2:42)
After reading this, I missing some of my friends even more. I think I’ll give them a call. How about you?
Come alongside… Which one of these benefits resonates with you most? Which one are you needing most right now? What can you do about it? Which friend can you reach out to and how? Would you share any other benefits of being and having friends? Would you consider passing this blog post to your family and friends?
Comfort… Coming Right Up! Er, Down!
Ever have someone tell you just what you needed to hear—without your asking?
It happened to me just a few minutes ago.
I’ve posted about my fear of publishing my very own book. I start then I stop. Start. Stop. Start. Stop. Right now, I’m stopped.
I’ve been praying about this because I know that this is what I’m supposed to do–and I want to do it! So I’ve been cuddling up to God the way I’ve posted before so that He’s the only One I see and hear, cheering me on the way He knows best. That’s when I’ve been able to start again.
This morning, a writer friend shared this on Facebook:
Say it to yourself!
Note 2 Self: No matter how afraid, indecisive, uncomfortable or anxious I am about my path, as long as I keep moving I will always make progress.
I really needed to hear that!
I didn’t expect anything more because I had already received the comfort I needed to take another step toward my goal. But when I thanked her, she comforted me even more.
All it takes is one step at a time. That’s how you get to your destination! It took me awhile to write my book. I’d be inspired one second and then once I got closer to completing it I would stop. Once I put aside my fear and anxiety over who would buy it, how would it be perceived, etc. and just finished and published it for the simple fact that it was something I set out to do, then everything else was easy. Most times the voices in our head that keep feeding us doubts and fears don’t know what they’re talking about! LOL
This is just what I’ve needed to get up, head to the office supply store, buy a pack of printer paper, and print out what I have so far.
What comfort!
Dear ones, God places people on our paths for specific reasons. Sometimes, we comfort them. Today, I was the one who needed comfort—though no one knew.
Isn’t God good? He knows just what we need even when we can’t put it into words ourselves.
Also, the Spirit helps us with our weakness. We do not know how to pray as we should. But the Spirit himself speaks to God for us, even begs God for us with deep feelings that words cannot explain. (Romans 8:26)
Once He hears us, He goes into action.
I will answer them before they even call to me. While they are still talking to me about their needs, I will go ahead and answer their prayers! (Isaiah 65:24)
Dear ones, He answered my prayers–yet again!
I pray blessings on that special person who used her passion for helping others to speak comfort and inspiration into my life just when I needed it most.
Today, someone came alongside me. And today, I come alongside you: God is listening–hang in there. Comfort’s coming right up–er, down!
Come alongside… Has this happened to you? Has someone shared with you something you needed to hear at the very moment you needed it? Scroll down and share it with us in the comments section.
Movies about Encouraging Others
The Story of My Life
Last week, my husband and I took a day trip over to Sarasota for the Ringling Museum. If you haven’t been, I highly recommend it. Mr. and Mrs. Ringling–yes, I’m talking about the circus folks–purchased 20 acres of waterfront property in the early 1900s and built a home there. Well, it’s really a mansion, and oh what a mansion!
The Ringlings loved art, and they built an impressive art collection over the years.
As my husband and I walked the 21-gallery art museum, we saw scenes of people’s lives.
- Biblical.
- Historical.
- Fictional.
- Everyday people.
Each painting or tapestry was distinct. But all told a story.
- A snapshot in time.
- A turning point in someone’s life.
- A story of the person’s life.
I got to wondering–as I often do… What’s the story of my life? If an artist wanted to tell others about me, what would he paint, draw, sculpt, or weave? I just couldn’t shake that thought as I took in each of the paintings throughout the day.
What is the story of your life? Think about it. What would you want an artist to portray about you?
My husband and I talked about this on our way home. I’ll share my story, and he’ll share his in the comments. But I wanted to start us off with my painting, my tapestry, my story.
I see a house–my house. The scene outside is rather dark, and as you approach the house, it is warmly lit. People–adults and kids alike–are walking up to the house worn and weary. Some are looking behind them as they run to my home. Others are leaving the house. They’re smiling, standing tall, healthy.
You can look inside the house through the front windows and see people–lots of them– sitting all around the front room. On the sofa, on the floor, on chairs. They’re huddled together, blankets over each person’s shoulders. There is some activity in and out of the other rooms, but the central focus is on the front room. All face in one direction–toward a cozy plantation chair in the corner. I am sitting on that chair reading to them from the Bible. Other books are on my lap. My eyebrows are raised, and I have smile on my face, as I lean in to tell them what appears to be good news.
The title of the painting is, “The Comfort Station.” (I actually have a sign in my house today.) The subtitle is, “Comforting others with the comfort she received from God (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).”
That’s how I would like to be remembered. That is the story of my life.
Come alongside… What is the story of your life? Share it with us. Invite your friends to share their stories.
(Remember… January is book giveaway month. The more you comment below, the more chances you have to win a copy of my new book, Women of the Secret Place.)
Resources for Leaving a Legacy
