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Discontentment from the daughter of the King?

 

Discontentment from the Daughter of the King?

I compare myself to others. Sometimes, it seems they have it better than I do.

 

  • Better relationships.
  • Better connections.
  • Better opportunities.

 

When I get into this funk, I think about it day in and day out.

 

I have to talk it out and empty myself of my frustrations–whether in my journal or with someone I trust. Eventually, I come back to Truth: God’s plans for me are unique (Jeremiah 29:11). They are unlike the plans He has for anyone else.

 

It may appear that they have it better, but their better is not necessarily my best. That’s not to say that God won’t give me those things; it means that God doesn’t want me to settle for better now when I can have His best later. When I believe that every good and perfect gift is from Him (James 1:17), my internal satisfaction is independent of my external circumstances. I am content with what I have and where I am now.

 

God is the King, and I am His daughter. He has plenty to go around. He may choose to bless other sons and daughters now. When I am content, I am blessed now–and later.

Come alongside… In what areas of life do you compare yourself with others? How can you learn to be content with what you have now?

 

6 Responses to Discontentment from the daughter of the King?

  • TrueHeartedOne says:

    Great post, Daphne! I think the more accurate question for me would be “In what areas of your life are you NOT prone to comparing yourself to others?” *smile*

    Needless to say, I can tend to compare myself to others in every way. What triggers me to begin comparing is when a desire is not met, or I am losing hope that it ever will be. It is then that I start to compare and admire the seemingly greener grass in the lives of others in that particular area.

    The area where I am most triggered lately (okay…the past five years!) is that of good health. I seem to be surrounded by a world filled with healthy people with seemingly endless energy. I quickly find myself thinking non-stop about all I can’t do.

    I am just now learning to be content where I “am.” I validate how I feel (rather than stuffing or denying it). That frees me up of the emotional weight of suppressed emotions. I am learning to stop seeing things as “black and white” (i.e. I am either sick, or healthy). That allows me to embrace what I CAN do and all the potential that lies within me EVEN IF I feel unwell.

    So…thanks for the reminder that God “holds my every moment” (line from one of my favorite songs) and has hands big enough to hold every moment for every one of his children. We can let go…

    • Daphne says:

      I like your question, TrueHeartedOne. 🙂

      I definitely agree with your triggers. Comparisons start brewing in my mind when one of my desires is not met.

      I can relate about comparing myself to others with good health. Just yesterday, I was out with friends, enjoying my time with them, and I began to feel that all too familiar pain. Sigh… Needless to say, we had to cut it short because I was not feeling well. I miss the days when I had unending energy…. But like you, I’m a firm believer in validating my feelings instead of suppressing them. You’re right: Much of life is not just “black and white.” There are many things I can do if I can just take my sights off what I can’t do and refocus on my blessings.

      Thanks for sharing, TrueHeartedOne.

      Big hugs,
      Daphne

  • Lynn says:

    Hi Daphne – so good to be able to respond to your posting here.

    I feel that all of us wander to the thoughts you express, the comparison trap. I surely do.

    I recently have watched a young gal ( age 29 ) meet the man of her dreams and become engaged within 4 months! They will marry in two more months. She is exhorting her friends to “not give up” as she had to wait 12 years for God to answer His promise to her that she would marry!

    Well, I can understand that statement from the joy of youth but I also find myself envious rather than comparing as I sit here never married at age 68!

    It is a real example in my life but it also is an example of getting caught in comparing myself in any area of live – being single and desiring marriage – being chronically ill and limited in how much activity in life is possible while others can be engaged in so many of lifes pursuits.

    Yet God has His plan for “me” – He compares me to none other. He longs to have me dwell in the faith of my covenant relationship with Him, trust His plans that are unique. He is working equally in my life to transform me into His image. That it looks different to me than what I see all around me is my problem to work on.

    Ah- how glad I am that He understands, smiles and leads me on His way. I, too have a very full journal. Fortunately, it is filled with more joy expressions than the harder questions – as real as both of them are.

    I agree with TrueHeartOne that this is a great post, an honest one that many who read it will relate to and ponder anew the unique relationship that each of us has with the Lord. Thanks!
    Hugs –

    • Daphne says:

      I rejoice with your friend, Lynn. God’s timing is perfect; I’m an example of that after having waited for what seems like so long after my divorce to just four months ago, when I married God’s gift to me. 🙂

      I can see how you would be envious, my friend. I send you big hugs and encourage you to continue to feel those feelings and express them to God.

      As I mentioned to TrueHeartedOne, my chronic health issues are a source of comparisons for me too. Just yesterday, I was out with friends and I had to cut it short because excruciating pain radiated through the lower half of my body. 🙁 I do miss those days when I had what seemed like neverending energy.

      Ooh, I like your statement: “He compares me to none other.” I will have to remember that. If He doesn’t compare me to others, why should I?

      Both the joy expressions and the harder questions have their place. And we can be free to express both to God whose love never changes for us.

      Thanks for sharing, Lynn.

      Big hugs,
      Daphne

  • Lynn says:

    Thanks for your thoughts in response, Daphne. I am so happy for you that you have found the love of your life – one that will stay! I have shared that joy with you on your Facebook postings.

    I am also aware that you continued to live your life and pursue your other dreams and allowed God to bring his man in His time.

    One of the traps, besides comparing ourselves to others is not embracing the life we have been given in the present moments. It is so important to attend to God’s present plans as they unfold in our lives and let Him bring any “more” in His good time, as well. Amen!

    • Daphne says:

      I appreciate your support on this journey, Lynn. 🙂

      It’s hard to live in the present moments. As cliche as it sounds, when we do, that’s when God brings us the desires of our hearts. In the fullness of time, God’s plan unfolded…

      Big hugs, my dear friend.
      Daphne

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