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Are we beyond help?

“I would love to talk to someone. I have so many problems. Sometimes, I think I’m beyond help.” That was the response of a Facebook friend to one of my recent posts that I was sharing my testimony at an upcoming recovery event. My friend had asked what the recovery was for. I replied with an explanation of the 12-step program, which led to her comment above.

 

I don’t know her very well, dear ones, but I admire her. Her first two sentences reveal that she admits she has problems, she can’t fix them on her own, and she’s willing to talk to someone about them. Reaching out takes courage. And on Facebook – on someone else’s wall whom you don’t know too well, I’d say that takes extra courage.

 

Her last sentence, though, troubled me. Not because I’ve never heard or felt that way myself but because I’ve heard those words all too often from so many people. Once, twice, maybe multiple times in my life, I have felt like a hopeless cause. I remember feeling that way specifically when my husband asked for a divorce. I felt he was giving up on me, that I would never change, and that there was no reason to keep waiting for our marriage to change. I thought I was beyond help.

 

I felt that way again last year when I was on medical leave from work for six months and my health continued its slippery decline. Medications just kept making things worse. Again, I thought I was beyond help.

 

No doubt the invalid at the pool of Bethesda felt the same way (see John 5:1-15). He wanted to be healed or else he wouldn’t have been waiting for the waters to be stirred so he could be the first to jump in. But he’d also been there 38 years. So when Jesus asked him, “Do you want to get well,” his reply was – now this is the Daphne paraphrase – “I think I’m beyond help” (verse 7).

 

But he wasn’t. I wasn’t. My friend isn’t. And you are not. God made the invalid well. God has made me well. He can make my friend well, and He can make you well too. No matter how long you’ve been hurting, dear one, God longs to show you compassion (Isaiah 30:18). We are not beyond His help (Psalm 46:1). We are not beyond His outstretched arms (Psalm 136:12). We are not beyond His love (Jeremiah 31:3).

 


 

Come alongside…. When have you felt beyond help? What did you do to reach out? Are you there now? What can you do to reach out – to others and to God?

 

8 Responses to Are we beyond help?

  • Daphne says:

    COMMENT FROM USER: elenarosario (posted in “Welcome”)

    Hello Daphne

    Anyone can become physically fit if he or she will regularly
    do certain exercises and practice good health habits. Likewise
    spiritual fitness is simply a matter of learning certain
    spiritual exercises and being disciplined to do them until they
    become yours. Through this journey i have learned so much from you
    and I’m so proud. Because of you, I learned to love God much more
    and the wisdom we share that comes from above. I always love you.

    • Daphne says:

      You’re right. Sometimes it takes discipline to reach out to others for help – whenever we need it – and to do it consistently, no matter how often we need to do it. And that includes God too. Thank you for your feedback and for joining me on this journey. Love you!

  • April M. Whitt says:

    Hello Daphne and friends!

    I have certainly felt beyond help. And even now sometimes (even though I’ve had some recovery.) I still catch myself feeling overwhelmed by my own mistakes and other challenges that surround me. But God truly has brought me through to a better place. I am stronger than I was just a year ago. God has used Celebrate Recovery to connect me with other inspiring people and helped me hold on while my faith was growing.

    On my refrigerator I have a little sign I made that reminds me to “Be anxious for nothing!” Phillipians 4:6. I have to remind myself of that quite often. But every time I catch myself trying to “freak out” over things–I refer myself to that scripture. It means to be anxious about NOTHING. That means NOTHING! It means to trust God with every single issue or concern in our lives. He really, truly does care, and with time and prayer–it will be okay. Love and blessings to you Daphne….April

    • Daphne says:

      I find that those overwhelming feelings tend to lead me to that place of feeling beyond help too, April. That’s when I remind myself to take a step back, take a deep breath, and as you said, be anxious for nothing. What is the root cause of my anxiety or those overwhelming feelings? What am I trying to control? Can I control it? Should I? The serenity prayer always helps too. Big Hugs, my friend. Thanks for your feedback.

  • torchgirl says:

    I tell you what. I know I have felt that way. That I was beyond help. So much so that I even thought that God had abandoned me, much like that fellow sitting by the pool, I was waiting for one miracle, and not paying a bit of mind to the even greater work that God wanted to do in my life.

    Awesome Blog my friend. Sorry we missed you tonight. Kevin’s back is hurting him really bad, so he didn’t even make it to church today. 🙂

    • Daphne says:

      I think my definition of help – or at least, my idea of help – is so limiting and finite. God must laugh at me sometimes. Okay, maybe lots of times. He has so much more in store for me in terms of “helping me.” Lord, help me to see it. Lord, help us all to see it…. Hope Kevin is feeling better my friend. Hugs, Daphne

  • GuichT says:

    I loved your blog ms daphne, i look forward to reading more.

    • Daphne says:

      Thank you, Benj. Who knows… You may just be the subject of one or two or three or more. 🙂 Thank you, as always, for your support. Hugs, Daphne

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